Jan. 22

 Hey, Joe

I just put my first letter to you in the mail yesterday, so I know you wouldn't have had to me to write back yet, but a few things occurred to me after I wrote it.

I don't know what kind of access you have to Internet or even writing or reading materials, so I'm sending you a few things with this letter. Writing paper, envelopes, a roll of stamps. I'll throw in a few books also. I just finished a couple I think you'll like since you're into little-known history like I am. 

Also, it occurred to me that your mail is probably being intercepted and/or monitored, so I'll try not to be too inquisitive about what's going on with or might affect your defense. Maybe the less said about the events of the 6th and anything in the days leading up to it, the better. TBH, I'm a lot more interested in figuring out how we got here in the first place. By "we" I don't mean just the two of us and the damaged ties, but the country as a whole. By "here" I mean this state of what seems like a divide so bitter and wide that it feels hopeless. Does it feel that way to you, or not? Does it bother you, or do you think it's good and necessary trouble?

This may get long. I'm sitting in the service waiting room at the Honda dealership. Something's going on with my airbag, and they're doing diagnostics. It'll be a while, a couple of hours at the least.

The divisiveness really troubles my spirit. But from the way people are behaving, I think there has to be an element of the population that is enjoying it. Has to be, or else it wouldn't be intensifying. There are people out there (I don't consider you to be among them) who seem to have been itching for chaos and anarchy and are relishing the opportunity to be a part of bringing it about. I don't understand that mindset. I mean, I do understand certain aspects and the mechanics of it, but I don't understand the mindset of people who salivate at the prospect of conflict and violent revolution. Maybe it's the mom in me. 

I remember reading a story a few years ago, an interview of a woman in her early twenties who said she grew up in a white supremacist cult. She said the majority of Americans have no idea just how serious and readied those factions are for the all-out race war they're determined to bring about. That story stuck with me for a long time, especially after I saw how easy it was for people to be swayed by rhetoric into aligning with and enabling those kinds of groups. We're living in an era in which every, single incident or utterance becomes politicized and is instantaneously hung unto an 'us' and 'them' framework. When that's the kind of milieu you're operating in, it becomes easy to make strange bedfellows and find yourself in a deal with the devil before you realize what's happening.

Like I said, I can kind of grasp how it happens, and maybe some of the motivations behind it, but I'm struggling to understand how some of the most progressive people I know, or thought I knew and shared a vision with, got pulled over to the opposite end of the spectrum. You may be the only person I can have a reasoned dialogue with who can help me understand it. For the life of me, I can't comprehend the journey that could take someone from being a grounded, peace-loving, justice-seeking humanitarian who was on the Bernie train to a Trump apologist who never met a conspiracy theory they didn't embrace as truth with no standard of proof. I'm not trying to be ugly in saying that, just stating it as simply and plainly as I see it. I just don't get a transformation that dramatic.

I'll have to wind this up later. They're texting me from inside about approving a repair. I'm going to put this in with the books and mail them this afternoon. Will write more when I get a chance.

Indy

RESPONSE FROM JOE:

Hey, Indy

First, thanks for getting in touch. I wouldn't have been surprised if you'd just blown Laura off when she reached out to you considering our last words prior to that. But you're a mensch in a pinch. Did I use that word right and spell it right? LOL I appreciate more your offer to help Laura out business wise with office stuff when you're feeling up to it. Not a whole lot to do in that regard at the moment, but it'll hopefully change. I don't have much to say right now. Not being bitter or petty, just my head not in the best place and concerned about the boys. They're supposed to start in person learning next week part-time, but still having to wear the damn masks, which makes no sense, They're boys. Active, normal boys who tussle and sweat, and now they probably even won't be allowed to get anywhere near anybody else. I expect they'll be acting out anyway because they don't understand what's going on with my situation. There might even be bullying to deal with if words gotten around about it with the faculty. I'm sure it has.

This place is as nasty as you would expect, everything about it. But that's the least of it. The waiting and boredom and hands tied is the worst, especially when I need to be taking care of things at home. You can imagine Laura's pretty put out with me because of the financial hit she's sure we're going to take no matter how this works out. Both my parents and hers are pissed off at me right now. My dad saying I won't see one thin dime from him because "right is right, but stupid is stupid." As if he gave me a handout or a step up ever in life. I've got a court appointed lawyer I don't put a lot of trust or faith in. Decent enough guy, but seems detached and negative. Already talking taking a plea and he barely asked me any questions. Laura doesn't think we should shell out for a private one because there's no telling how high the fees could go and she's worried about maintaining the business. I keep reminding her things are going to naturally pick up in a few weeks. At least with our corporate accounts. They'll pay to maintain landscaping no matter what. But she's worried we won't be able to hire back some of our decent crew and lose even that business. She worries too much, but that's a woman. No offense. LOL. There should be bail assistance rolling out soon. Trump's not going to just leave patriots hanging. That's what libs don't understand. This was more well oiled, funded, and planned than watchers think. The 6th was just a warmup, a scrimmage if you will. I know you're not buying that, but it's okay. Doesn't change my opinion that you're one of the smartest people I know. You're just doing your own thing now and not plugged in to alt sources. I get that part, it can be too much when you're already dealing with anxiety and medical issues. Write me all you want. I'll be reading. Will reply when I can. Every now and then I get Internet access. Restricted and not a lot of PCs here.

Joe